Bruce Springsteen

The NFL announced that Bruce Springsteen perform at this seasons Superbowl...

And today the Rams said they look forward to watching that performance on TV.

Saint Louis Lambs

The Saint Louis Rams have now lost 4 in a row -- losing again yesterday to Buffalo. Thankfully, some good news for the Rams -- the Federal Government has decided to bail them out.

Shouldn't He Be Busy Making Toys For Santa?

Dennis Kucinich wasn't happy about the government's big bailout plan... he was fired up yesterday at a press conference and said instead of voting NO on the package, he intended to vote "Hell no".

He went on to add that this sort of thing just doesn't fly with my constituents back home in munchkin-land.

Dennis said he hoped the bill could pass early Monday morning because he needed to get back to helping make toys for Santa at the North Pole.

Actually Dennis didn't know anything about the bailout plan, he just heard there was an opportunity to get on television.

We Lost Another Good One

One of my favorite Paul Newman moments was a time he appeared as a guest on the David Letterman show. Dave talked him into getting into a basket, that was tied to a crapload of helium balloons. They cut them loose and up went Paul Newman flying over New York City. It was hilarious! It's hard to find anyone that has a bad thing to say about the guy. His salad dressing isn't too bad, either. Paul Newman -- dead at the age of 83.

Thursday's Segment

They blew off my segment today (shows ya how important I am, huh?) so here are the jokes I was going to tell..................


A woman from Germany could be facing 10 years in prison for robbing banks. The woman was caught because of her giant butt. Turns out one witness who happened to be in line behind her described her enormous rear end to police. Apparently, she slid the bank teller a note that said "Give me all your money or I'll sit on you"

President Bush invited the Presidential candidates to the White House today -- And wouldn't ya know it, first one there was Hillary Clinton.

A 13 year old boy is fighting for his right to wear makeup to school... His teachers say the makeup is distracting.. The boy is in 8th grade at the Joe Hipperson Middle School.

There's this new cell phone service in London that helps tourists find the closest public bathroom. The trick of course is finding one not occupied by George Michael.

Well you know, George Michael was arrested yet again the other day for using drugs in a public toilet. George told police there weren't any drugs involved -- He said he was just on a date with Larry Craig.

WHAT??!??!!

Clay Aiken announced today that he's officially coming out of the closet and said: "I'm gay".

Ok, isn't that like the Rams announcing they're in last place?"

That's A Big One

A mining company in London says they've unearthed a 478 carrat diamond.... and wouldn't ya know it -- today, Kobe Bryant bought it for his wife.

Karen Vail

It was brought to my attention that some people have been looking on my personal website for info about Karen Vail... you need to be on the "Large Morning Show Blog" -- which you can find HERE.

Emmy Awards

The Emmy Awards were delayed last night after police found an air rifle in the trunk of a car.

The suspects were immediately arrested by officers from CSI, Law and Order and Reno 911.

New Poll

A new poll shows that more people say they'd want to watch a football game with Barack Obama...

Although to be fair the same poll showed more people would rather be with John McCain to watch Green Acres.

Housing Mess

I'm not even going to pretend to know what's going on right now on Wall Street. Best I can tell, people got greedy and people got sloppy. Now, they need to be bailed out or we're in big trouble.

Now what I do understand is why it's ridiculous to have the federal government bail out homeowners who can't pay their mortgage. Why on Earth should my tax dollars bail out some person that bought a house that they couldn't afford? Doesn't some personal responsibility come into play here?

I saved my money, and took time to study and learn about home economics before I purchased my house. So far, so good. It's absurd that some politicians (mainly Democrats) want to bail out people that weren't responsible. Well, where's the reward for those of us that ARE responsible? Where's the handout for those of us that save our money and budget so we CAN afford our homes? What's the incentive for people like me that did things the RIGHT way?

A Dysfunctional Family

Just about every family has a little bit of dysfunction in it. Here's a clip of us talking about dysfunctional families and my recent experience at a family reunion:

Click HERE To Listen!

Best Football Watching Candidate

A new poll shows that more people say they'd want to watch a football game with Barack Obama... Although to be fair the same poll showed more people would rather be with John McCain to watch Green Acres.

Fidel Castro Is A Stud?

Who knows if it's true or not... but, Fidel Castro makes a claim in an upcoming documentary that he has slept with THIRTY FIVE THOUSAND WOMAN! He says he has slept with 2 woman a day for nearly four decades.

And I thought this was nice -- today, he was made an honorary member of the NBA.

A Beautiful Day!

It was so nice today -- KTRS was handing out a free bottle of sunscreen with each pink slip

It was so nice out today -- the Rams decided to get their butts kicked in the park.

Tough Day

Rough day on wall street... a lot of people lost a lot of money -- and that's just the people that bet on the Rams over the weekend.

Someone actually gave me a couple tickets to Sundays game and I had left them sitting in the front seat of my car.... and wouldn't ya know it, someone broke in and left two more tickets.

Like Mother Like Sons

Britney Spears threw a birthday party for her sons over the weekend and got each of them a mini motorized car they could drive. You can tell they take after their mother because they immediately crashed into one another.

Virginity Up For Auction

A girl from Sacramento, California has put her virginity up for auction to help pay off her student loans -- so far, the bid is $250,000.

Barack Obama heard about this and said "You can put lipstick on a slut, but it's still a slut."

Trouble In North Korea

North Korean leader Kim Jong Il has apparently had a stroke. It sounds pretty serious because they say he's thinking of changing his name from Kim Jong Il to Kim Jong Dead.

I'll Fly Southwest Instead

Continental airlines says they will make an extra 100 million dollars this year by charging passengers that 15 dollar fee for checked baggage.

The bad news is they're making a lot money off you with those ridiculous fees -- the good news is they say they'll still lose your luggage for free.

Bubba's Crazy

Today, former President Bill Clinton said that Barack Obama "will win handily".

Love ya, Bubba -- but you're out of your mind.

In fact, I'm starting to wonder if this may be the year that the electoral college is actually tied at the end of Election night in November. It's possible. 268 to 268 is definitely possible.

But, winning handily? Not a chance. Then again, this is the guy that told us he never had sexual relations -- so who knows if he was being serious or not.

Today We Remember...

Lipstick On A Pig

Some say that pig reference is a slam on Gov Sarah Palin which is not a smart move.

But, Obama later corrected himself, and said the quote was supposed to be "If you put lipstick on a pig... it's still Rosie O Donnell."

Extreme Home Makeover

You probably know from listening to The Big 550 -- the show "Extreme Home Makeover" is in Saint Louis this week, and just happens to be doing their work down the street from where my Dad lives. So, after dropping by for a visit with Mr. Clevlen, we took a walk to see the project in action. It was pretty unreal. Round the clock workers, and crowds of people everywhere checking it out. I'm curious what the other neighbors got out of the deal, because they have literally no use of their driveways, roads or sidewalks. Not to mention, strangers are walking all over their lawns, etc.

But, I guess it's all for a good cause -- so I'm sure they sucked it up for the cause. Either way, it's pretty impressive.

I took a few photos with my phone while I was over there. Sorry they're not the greatest quality, but I wasn't planning on visiting the site -- so I didn't have my good camera. :)

New Polls & Hot Frames

John McCain is actually beating Barack Obama in the latest presidential polls.... although, to be fair Obama says he predicted this very thing in the book of Revelations.

A lot of women want Sarah Palin's eyeglasses. It's apparently the new fad. Women are actually going to their doctors and trying to get the same eyeglass frames. Not to be outdone, Obama supporters are going to doctors trying to get their ears enlarged.

Rest In Peace Old Friend

Rest in peace, Mike... Mike Swoboda was a good guy and a loyal listener of the show.

KIRKWOOD, Mo. (AP) — The former mayor of a St. Louis suburb who was badly wounded when a gunman opened fire at a City Council meeting died Saturday of complications connected to his injuries, a spokeswoman for a St. Louis hospital said.

The former mayor, Mike Swoboda, who had been in hospice care, would have turned 70 this month.

A Kirkwood resident, Charles L. Thornton, killed a police officer outside of City Hall on Feb. 7, then burst into a Council meeting and killed another officer, two council members and the public works director. He also shot and wounded a reporter.

Mr. Swoboda was shot twice in the head and was in a hospital for weeks. His health had suffered setbacks in recent months.

What Are They Thinking??

Word is that the Obama campaign is trying to uncover dirt on Sarah Palin's church up in Alaska.

Hmm.. is that really the fight the Obama folks want to get into? Seems to me, church affiliations would be the LAST thing they'd bring into the discussion. I would certainly think the last thing they'd want is Rev. Wright on TV commercials going into the Fall election.

Dead Or Alive?

Some experts say that they believe the leader of North Korea... Kim Jong Ill.... actually died back in 2003 and was replaced with a look a like. How bout that?

Now that's not to be confused with the moderator of Donnybrook -- who died back in 2003 and still shows up for work.

Idiots!

A couple of idiot protesters interrupted John McCains speech last night. Thankfully Sarah Palin blew em away with her shot gun.

How bout that Sarah Palin? Boy, she came out swinging and let the Democrats have it last night. Dick Cheney said he was so impressed with his potential successor that he had 3 heart attacks.

Some people say that they're offended that McCain picked her for his running mate.. I don't blame McCain at all -- truth is, at McCain's age - he didn't want to risk having to get mouth to mouth in the oval office from Mitt Romney.

Some people say she was too mean... Jesse Jackson apparently didn't like her -- he said she was so mean, he wanted to cut her nuts off.

Did You Miss Something?

I'm hearing some whining this morning from Democrats that didn't particularly like Sarah Palin's speech last night. That's fine. Most Republicans didn't care much for Joe Biden or Barack Obama last week when they spoke to the nation.

The problem is I'm hearing they didn't like Sarah Palin because "she was too mean."

Huh?

Were these people sleeping through the last two weeks? Did they sleep through the Democratic convention where Obama and Biden tore apart John McCain? Did they miss the press ripping apart this woman and her family all week? And, now when Sarah strikes back they're upset?

Whatever happened to being able to take it if you're going to dish it out?

Enough Already

I try to stick to telling jokes and making people laugh, but once in awhile you have to take on serious issues and take a stand for what's right.

It infuriates me to see the way John McCain's running mate, Sarah Palin has been treated by most of the media, some of the nuts on the left and even some Republicans. Even some of these so called feminists that claim they're for women's right. Yeah, whatever.

Most people don't follow politics that closely, and I can't say that I blame them. However, I follow politics very closely and have known about Sarah Palin for quite awhile. In fact, I was hoping that Senator McCain would pick her. I didn't think he actually would, and like most people I was shocked when he announced her.

This woman has had to endure unbelievable attacks from so called media professionals, like CNN's Campbell Brown who actually asked "Can she be a good mother if she runs for office?" Huh?!?

You've got to be kidding me. It's not Campbell Brown or anyone else's business what she wants to do with regards to her family. Not to mention, I've never heard anyone ask ANY of the male candidates if they can be good Fathers while running office. This is a strong, smart woman and a lot of people are afraid of that. Too bad, so sad. Get over it.

My Father gave me a good piece of advice when I was younger and just starting my career. He said to give people a chance.

A couple of people in my industry had certain reputations. I went along with other people's opinions about what kind of people they were before I even got to know them personally. Turns out, Dad was right and the two people I once thought were obnoxious and not so great folks.... turned out to be wonderful people and great friends. Had I listened to what jealous and bitter people said about them, I would have missed out on two great mentors and life long friendships.

People need to give Sarah Palin a chance.

Tonight, she will speak to the nation and I predict she hits a home run. I also predict that regular, decent people in this country will proclaim enough is enough... and all of these attacks will backfire.

Sarah Palin is going to be a rock star. That apparently scares some people. Good.

Another Hot Mic Busting

Did these two idiots not learn anything from Jesse Jackson? Apparently not. A Republican strategist, Mike Murphy and older than dirt, irrelevant columnist Peggy Noonan were caught on mic today, bashing Senator McCain's VP pick, Sarah Palin.

Watch:



The best part is that Noonan wrote a piece just a few days ago defending Palin. What a hypocrite.

Nice Landing!

Here's video of a guy that accidentally lands at the wrong football stadium in a parachute this past weekend. Oops.

Careful What Ya Wish For...

One of Mom's favorite things to do is ask me why she's never featured on my blog. I have to explain to her that it's made for jokes and entertainment news. No tellin where these photos of my Mother came from, but I think it'd be hard to argue that they're both entertaining and hilarious.

This should be a good indicator as to whether she even reads my website.

If I Could Be Any Person....

I think I'd like to be country singer, Trace Adkins for a day. Here's a pretty good video of him from Christmas time last year promoting his latest CD, and then a performance on Opry Live of one of his hit songs.

Bad Jobs

Watching the news last night, I noticed this reporter for FOX news right in the middle of the hurricane winds in Louisiana. He's trying to stand up straight with water blowing in his face.

Then I noticed, this is the same guy that last week was in the country of Georgia covering the Russian invasion and was being shot at by rebels. Turns out he also had to go cover Hurricane Katrina.

Who did this guy piss off at Fox News!?

And why do news people need to cover hurricanes on location in the first place? What's the point? Although, my favorite coverage moment was former CBS news Anchor Dan Rather hanging onto an telephone poll because he was about to blow away during a storm in the late 90's.